Today I read this quote from Zelda, the daughter of Robin Williams regarding social media, "I will be leaving this account for a [bit] while I heal and decide if
I'll be deleting it or not," she writes. "In this difficult time, please
try to be respectful of the accounts of myself, my family and my
friends. Mining our accounts for photos of dad, or judging me on the
number of them is cruel and unnecessary. There are a couple throughout,
but the real private moments I shared with him were precious, quiet, and
believe it or not, not full of photos or 'selfies.' "
On Monday, my heart was hurting for a family that I know, because the patriarch of their family had died. Then later on that day I found out about the death of Robin Williams and I prayed for his family as well. Losing my own father in 2012 has made me extra sensitive to those who lose their own. With that said I would never try to compare my grief to their grief. A dear friend of mine, who I called to vent after someone had made hurtful remarks about the loss of my daddy, wisely stated that you can't compare grief, grief is different for everyone. For example, I have two brothers and we have handled our grief differently and we lost the same dad. But we each had an unique relationship with him.
In my situation I was grateful for social media during that time, because I could pass along info without having to talk to a lot of people. Weeks after the funeral I would go out to eat by myself to parts of the Metro that I didn't know anyone, so I didn't have to talk to anyone. Don't get me wrong I spoke to those nearest to me, but there were days that being asked how I was doing was annoying. How was I doing???? It had felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I was dealing with mean & hurtful words from people because I didn't grieve "publicly" enough. I put it in quotes because I'm not famous. God knows how much I grieved and how much I still grieve. Last night I was watching a tribute to Robin Williams and they showed this side angle of him somewhere and he was wearing a baseball cap, he had a grey gotee and something about it made a picture of my dad flash in my head and my breath caught. With that said I am very grateful that I had heard some talk of Beth Moore's about how she had full freedom to tattle tale to God about things people say to her. He and my close friends got an ear full. Why anyone stays friends with me is beyond me.
I am so grateful that my dad was not a celebrity. I don't know if I would've had enough restraint to just respond with taking a break from social media. I probably would've taken a baseball bat to my computer, after seeing some of the things Zelda saw on social media. I probably would've also taken the baseball bat to my phone, tablet, the TV, the radio in my car...you get the point.
An area in my life that I have been praying for growth is empathy. I don't know everything someone else has gone through. It is impossible and I guess that is why I get so mad, when I hear people judging and tearing apart others because in their mind they would've handled things differently. You don't know that! See I'm struggling with the being patient with judgers (totally made up word) part of this whole growth process.
Why is it so hard for us to love others where they are at?
